Why I Am Not an Atheist

Why I Am Not an Atheist (Penguin Press), named one of The New Yorker’s Best Books of 2026, is Beha’s deeply personal and philosophical exploration of belief, doubt, and meaning. After abandoning his lifelong Catholic faith and embracing atheism, Beha embarked on a decades-long search for answers to some of life’s most enduring questions: what we can know, what we must do, and what we may hope. On this journey, Beha traces the development of scientific materialism and romantic idealism, two major atheist worldviews. In doing so, he arrives at the surprising inclusion that faith ultimately offers a more complete account of human experience. A seamless blend of memoir and intellectual inquiry, this compelling work invites readers to grapple with the profound questions that shape how we live.